The Gift of Giving

       I have come across a story that seems like a fairy tale but truly happened in the early 90s during the Bosnian war. It would remind you of an old fairy tale about a golden fish caught by a poor fisherman who begged to free him since he was actually a prince. When the wife of the poor fisherman was told of his experience, she asked her husband to return and make a wish to the golden fish for them to be free from poverty. Though a disaster happened later in the fairy tale, the true story I have read is in a way different since the blessings given to the family are intact.

      This true story began in the northwestern village of Jezero, before the outbreak of the Bosnian War. A father named Smajo Malkoc returned from a trip in Austria bringing with him a gift of an aquarium with two goldfish for his two teenage sons. Two years later, women and children fled but the men stayed back to resist the attack of Bosnian Serb forces. Smajo Malkoc was killed and his wife, Fehima, sneaked into the destroyed village, secretly buried his husband, and took whatever remains she could get off their belongings. Fehima took pity on the fish in the aquarium and she let them out in the nearby lake saying to herself, "This way, they might be more fortunate than us."

      Later in 1995, Fehima returned with his two sons to their home. Looking toward the lake, she glimpsed something strange on the lake and walked over to the shore to find out. She found out that the whole lake was full of shining golden fish. From then on, they started caring for and selling the goldfish, and 3 years after, the Malkoc house is one of the biggest in their village. The Malkoc family said they have enough money to quit worrying about the future. According to one of the sons, it was a special kind of gift from their father. 

       The father took the initiative of giving the gift of goldfish to his two sons, then the mother follows by giving the gift of freedom and life to the two goldfish by letting them to the lake during the war, thus, life underwater flourished and the gift of hope and new life had come to the Malkoc family after the war. Homes, stores, and coffee shops all over the region had their aquariums with goldfish from Jezero. This story is a good example of giving and receiving that the gift of love or an act of kindness, no matter how small or insignificant it may be, God blesses and uses it to accomplish and fulfill great things. "Give, and it will be given unto you" (Luke 6:38). We should not doubt that God can take whatever we offer Him and turn it into something magnificent. Amid chaos and trouble, God's grace is relentless, and his kingdom is flourishing even though life on the surface is full of trouble and strife. 

English 101: Simple Tenses of The Verb (series 1.C3)

     Verbs should be studied thoroughly along with subject nouns for they are the basic foundation in constructing a grammatically correct sentence. The time constraints involved in accomplishing the "action word" should be checked if it agrees with the time the action has or had been done. The verb should also agree with the subject noun in a sentence. Tenses tell us about the time when a certain action has been made or happened. The confusion of some students lies in identifying when to add 's' to a verb and what are the regular and irregular verbs. The best strategy for the latter is to memorize all of them, that's why I provided a link where to find this list of regular/irregular verbs. But first, let's start by identifying the Basic Tenses - Present, Past, and Future.

A) Present tense expresses the following actions or conditions:
          -action happening at the present moment
          -an action that happens habitually
          -a present condition
       
* we usually take the base form of a verb when we refer to the plural subject; if the subject is singular, we add "s" to the base form of the verb.
* the am, is, are linking verbs are used when referring to a present condition.

Examples:
     1) The alarms simultaneously ring every morning.
            (plural subject=alarms; verb=ring;
                    every morning=time referred to as habitual)
               
     2) The boys run towards the gate.

     3) We are the facilitator of the event. (are=stating present condition)

     4) Jenny goes home from Manila every summer. 
            (singular subject=Jenny; verb=goes;
                    every summer=time referred to as habitual)
   
     5) The smoke comes from the basement.

     6) She is the mother of the future king.

     7) I am the owner of this site.


B) Past tense expresses action or state-of-being that took place in the past.

* the past tense form of a verb (regular/irregular) is used (see the list)
* the past action uses the time to express past action, i.e.,
yesterday, last time, for, the actual date
* the was, were linking verbs are used to express the state-of-being in the past

Examples:
     1) The man waited for his lady for two hours.
             (take note of the verb-waited & the time-for two hours)

     2) She went to the grocery.

     3) Tom and Jerry played outside yesterday.

     4) Last night, I met my former classmate inside the mall.

     5) The President signed a peace treaty.


C) Future tense expresses an action that would take place sometime in the future. It also expresses a prediction or gives an order.

* the auxiliary verbs will or shall is added along with the base form of a verb
* actual future date or predictors can be used, i.e., soon, next, on

Examples:
    1) The Red Warriors will play against the Green Archers on Sunday.

    2) We shall have to abide by these camp rules.

    3) Will you please stop talking?

    4) The election will be on May 9.

    5) You shall not kill.

    6) Deniece and William will soon get married.

* shall is being used as a future predictor of the action in which the subject has an obligation or responsibility to do the stated action.

Also, check other topics under this category/label, just click the topic link:
Parts of Speech,  Kinds of Nouns,  Singular and Plural Nouns,  Uses of Nouns,  Kinds of Pronouns,  Kinds of Verbs, Characteristics of Verb.

#verb #verbtenses #simpletenses #presenttense #pasttense #futuretense #regular/irregularverb #English101 #grammar #sentenceconstruction

Depression During and After Pregnancy

   

    One special thing that could happen to a marriage is for a wife to bear a child. Being pregnant is a wonderful event in one's married life. However, pregnancy entails responsibility, proper care, and a ton of understanding from both the husband and the pregnant wife herself, and as much as possible from the people around and the community where the couple belongs. Nowadays, malls and public transportation provide designated areas and support signages for pregnant women. There are special provision or treatment given to pregnant women, yet, a lack or no knowledge of why is it being given still exist. 

      Yes ..physically, we all know what pregnant women feel but most people do not know the emotional and psychological aspects of being pregnant, why they feel, or why they act differently. And being misunderstood as one hormonal imbalanced woman during my pregnancy period, as well as after giving birth which is the more dangerous one than the latter, I have felt the urge to search and write about what I had been through. Depression occurs in this women's stages, aside from the pre-and post-menstrual period of a woman, pregnancy during and after enters into another stage of mood swings, also known as depression.
     During my pregnancy with my third child, though it was planned, there were days of crying, wanting my husband's attention then, worried about everything, and I slept late because I wanted to finish all the household chores-washing the clothes, mopping the floor, ironing the clothes, etc. I felt the same when I had my fourth pregnancy, I always felt tired then, and I lost interest in cleaning the house, which is the opposite of my third. The knowledge of having a baby with a congenital defect inside my womb added to my anxiety and the marital conflict I had with my husband. 

    After giving birth, I remember those times in my hospital bed when I cried and cried feeling alone, needing someone to talk to, and yet the one I am expecting to comfort me seems far away though near me. I don't know how long it lasted, I lose interest in everything, and I shut myself out from other people. But then I have to take my composure since I have a baby to care for who needs my special attention.

    Everything is history now and looking back still gives me some pain about whom to talk to and always being misunderstood. I do hope whoever reads, be patient with your pregnant neighbors or relatives, especially those who had just given birth, we may never know what they are going through. 

    And being a father-to-be for the first time, auntie or uncle, take note of these antepartum and postpartum blues, so you would know how to relate to or take care of them. For those who are pregnant feeling the same, do not be ashamed, it is not our fault and we can talk about it to our doctors and partners. Here is some information on the symptoms you might be experiencing.      

According to Mayo Clinic, some symptoms of antepartum (depression during pregnancy):

• persistent sadness
• unusual sleeping habits
• inability to concentrate
• loss of interest in the things/activities she usually enjoys
• feelings of guilt or worthlessness
• changes in eating habits
• anxiety/worry too much

These signs, however, are not exclusive or limited by themselves. A manifestation of 2 or more is an early sign of antepartum depression. 1 out of 4 pregnant women suffers from antepartum blues.

Depression after giving birth also affects 20% of women."Baby blues" is the early onset of depression after delivery which lasted up to two weeks, whereas postpartum depression lasted several weeks after giving birth. These two are commonly mistaken as the same, however, the latter is most intense and severe which requires medical intervention

Some symptoms of postpartum "baby blues" as stated by Mayo Clinic includes mood swings, anxiety, sadness, irritability, crying without apparent reasons, feeling overwhelmed, sleeping and appetite problem, and reduced concentration. Postpartum depression (PPD),  is also known as Prenatal Depression.

The PPD symptoms are as follows:

• depressed mood or severe mood swings
• severe anxiety and panic attacks
• excessive sadness
• intense irritability and anger
• excessive crying
• loss of appetite or eating more than usual
• inability to sleep or excessive sleeping
• loss of interest in things she usually enjoys
• overwhelming fatigue or loss of energy
• feeling of worthlessness and guilt
• inability to think clearly and concentrate
• difficulty bonding with her baby
• shutting out from family and friends
• thoughts of harming the baby
• fear of not being a good mother
• recurrent thoughts of death or suicide

You may click these other links for a more detailed discussion about antepartum and postpartum depression:

http://www.postpartumprogress.com/antenatal-depression-robbed-of-the-joy-of-pregnancy

http://www.postpartum.net/learn-more/depression-during-pregnancy-postpartum/
http://www.webmd.com/depression/postpartum-depression/