One special thing that could happen to a marriage is for a wife to bear a child. Being pregnant is a wonderful event in one's married life. However, pregnancy entails responsibility, proper care, and a ton of understanding from both the husband and the pregnant wife herself, and as much as possible from the people around and the community where the couple belongs. Nowadays, malls and public transportation provide designated areas and support signages for pregnant women. There are special provision or treatment given to pregnant women, yet, a lack or no knowledge of why is it being given still exist.
Yes ..physically, we all know what pregnant women feel but most people do not know the emotional and psychological aspects of being pregnant, why they feel, or why they act differently. And being misunderstood as one hormonal imbalanced woman during my pregnancy period, as well as after giving birth which is the more dangerous one than the latter, I have felt the urge to search and write about what I had been through. Depression occurs in this women's stages, aside from the pre-and post-menstrual period of a woman, pregnancy during and after enters into another stage of mood swings, also known as depression.
During my pregnancy with my third child, though it was planned, there were days of crying, wanting my husband's attention then, worried about everything, and I slept late because I wanted to finish all the household chores-washing the clothes, mopping the floor, ironing the clothes, etc. I felt the same when I had my fourth pregnancy, I always felt tired then, and I lost interest in cleaning the house, which is the opposite of my third. The knowledge of having a baby with a congenital defect inside my womb added to my anxiety and the marital conflict I had with my husband.
After giving birth, I remember those times in my hospital bed when I cried and cried feeling alone, needing someone to talk to, and yet the one I am expecting to comfort me seems far away though near me. I don't know how long it lasted, I lose interest in everything, and I shut myself out from other people. But then I have to take my composure since I have a baby to care for who needs my special attention.
Everything is history now and looking back still gives me some pain about whom to talk to and always being misunderstood. I do hope whoever reads, be patient with your pregnant neighbors or relatives, especially those who had just given birth, we may never know what they are going through.
And being a father-to-be for the first time, auntie or uncle, take note of these antepartum and postpartum blues, so you would know how to relate to or take care of them. For those who are pregnant feeling the same, do not be ashamed, it is not our fault and we can talk about it to our doctors and partners. Here is some information on the symptoms you might be experiencing.
According to
Mayo Clinic, some symptoms of
antepartum (depression during pregnancy):
- persistent sadness
- unusual sleeping habits
- inability to concentrate
- loss of interest in the things/activities she usually enjoys
- feelings of guilt or worthlessness
- changes in eating habits
- anxiety/worry too much
These signs, however, are not exclusive or limited by themselves. A manifestation of 2 or more is an early sign of antepartum depression. 1 out of 4 pregnant women suffers from antepartum blues.
Depression after giving birth also affects 20% of women."Baby blues" is the early onset of depression after delivery which lasted up to two weeks, whereas postpartum depression lasted several weeks after giving birth. These two are commonly mistaken as the same, however, the latter is most intense and severe which requires medical intervention
Some symptoms of
postpartum "baby blues" as stated by
Mayo Clinic includes mood swings, anxiety, sadness, irritability, crying without apparent reasons, feeling overwhelmed, sleeping and appetite problem, and reduced concentration. Postpartum depression (PPD), is also known as Prenatal Depression.
The PPD symptoms are as follows:
- depressed mood or severe mood swings
- severe anxiety and panic attacks
- excessive sadness
- intense irritability and anger
- excessive crying
- loss of appetite or eating more than usual
- inability to sleep or excessive sleeping
- loss of interest in things she usually enjoys
- overwhelming fatigue or loss of energy
- feeling of worthlessness and guilt
- inability to think clearly and concentrate
- difficulty bonding with her baby
- shutting out from family and friends
- thoughts of harming the baby
- fear of not being a good mother
- recurrent thoughts of death or suicide
You may click these other links for a more detailed discussion about antepartum and postpartum depression: